philly convention weekend

Basically the Philly  tattoo convention was the highlight of my month. February has been extremely slow and boring, hence the lack of blog entries. I left saturday morning for Philly and it only took me an hour and 45 minutes to get there, except for the fact that I got so completely lost in the city trying to figure out where the convention was. I had to have driven around for a good 45 minutes, but I managed to find it eventually. I met up with Nina and all the other GQ ladies and worked the booth for a little until I ran into Solveigh! We wandered the convention for a while and made conversation with quite some interesting people. I ended up getting the side of my hands tattooed for 50 bucks. Around 9ish, all of the GQs and I had to meet up at the "Urban Ink Magazine" room for a group photo shoot that is going to be featured in one of their upcoming issues. There were so many of us and the room was so small and the lights were brighter then you could ever imagine. Overall, the shoot was a lot of fun. After the convention i drove down to Baltimore and spent the night there. Drove back this afternoon, blah blah blah. Went riding at 4, which went extremely well. That about sums it up! 

xxo

Every Avenue- A Story To Tell Your Friends

Dont go away again, I want to be more than a phone call at 4 A.M.

Seems like every time you come back home

Its just to steal my heart and leave

Dont go away again, I want to be more than a story to tell your friends

Seems like every time you come back home

Its just to make me fall again

for once in my life...

I have absolutely NO clue what I want. I'm at a loss. 

Valentines day

was real good this year. I wasnt it expecting it to be anything spectacular cause I dont really like valentines day all that much. But it surprised me this year. I had a photoshoot all day on 37th and 9th street in new york city. The studio was amazing. It overlooked the whole city. We had so much fun shooting and goofing around and what not. After the shoot I took a cab to brooklyn and hung out with anthony for the night and watched a lot of Roccos Modern Life which happens to be my all time favorite Nickelodeon cartoon. Thats basically it. Today i am going riding at 4. Hopefully it goes better then last time and my horse doesnt get into a brawl with another horse. Life is good.

AND Im extremely stoked on april 13-17 cause i am going to be spending 5 days in NYC taking a special effects makeup class called "5 Days with a Madman".

xxo

i just wrote out a huge long paragraph about a major part of my life that most people dont know, and then deleted it cause i dont think im ready to tell anyone about it just yet. but as far as updates go, these past few days have been pretty boring. except yesterday...i went to my moms apartment to go pick up some stuff i left there a while ago. she wouldnt answer the door. and i knew she was home because her car was in the parking lot, and since she doesnt have a job anymore, she has no where else to be other than in her apartment. i knocked on her door, called her, rang the doorbell for a god ten minutes. and the next thing i know, 3 cop cars pull up and they all came up to me. i told them that it was my moms apartment and ive been calling her and knocking but she wont answer. they believed me thank god lol. they all know my mom already cause of previous incidents that she got herself into (which i wont get into right now). so finally my mom comes to the door. her makeup is all over her face, and she can barely walk or talk straight. she apologizes to me cause she thought it was someone else knocking at her door, which i dont understand, because i kept calling her and she would have seen my name come up on her phone screen. but then again, she was drunk. after the police left i went inside with her. of course we got into an argument and i yelled at her. out of nowhere, this trailer trash looking guy walks out of her bedroom, and tells me i have a foul mouth. he, too, is drunk. me and this random dude that my mom calls her "boyfriend" had an ongoing argument. i wont get into detail about what he said or what i said. but i was furious with both him and my mother. 

one of these days ill take the time to start from the beginning about the story of me and my mom, and then maybe it will be easier to understand..but for now, im just going to leave it at this.

on a better note, me and jess had coldstone and starbucks tonight and we got harassed by two asian ladies with a guitar for some money to help save the children of asia, so i gave her a dollar. it was an extremely funny moment, but you had to be there :) i bought a cute jacket from h&m today with the money that was supposed to go towards my parking fine which was due today. o well. and tomorrow im going to the barn at 630 to go riding. thats about it.

OH and im extremely excited about the weekend. i have a photoshoot on valentines day in nyc and then going out to dinner with my best friend in the evening.

THE END

xxo

today..

was just perfect. i took the day off from class, just because. i got up somewhat early and got some starbucks and just hang out for a little..i got some work done on my arm today and its all finally coming together and looking amazing. i went riding tonight and had an awesome time. im going again this saturday and i cant wait. ever since i started riding again i feel like i found a part of me that has been missing. sounds lame, i know. but on the real, life just isnt the same without it! <3

i got sum sw33t shadezzzz!

this weekend wasnt so bad after all. it was actually really good. friday i had work till 7 and then i just stayed home and watched movies. saturday i started up horseback riding again now that i actually have money. its something that been part of my life since i was little and about a year ago i had to stop because it got too expensive and the barn went through an entire new management process, which made it complicated to ride there. but things are good there now which means i am able to ride again. i missed it SO much. it was basically my life, and now that i have it back, i couldnt be happier and im not going to let it slip away again. it was one of the things that i could actually say i was really good at. im so sore since i havent ridden in a while, but its a good kinda sore, if that makes any sense. so anyway, i spent a few hours at the stables and then went home to shower and then drove down to kaits. we went over to jays house for a little and didnt get back to kaits till around 430am. i didnt get to sleep till 530 though. the next morning kait brought me to MJM and i got two new pairs of betsey johnson shoes for SOOO CHEAP and they are sososo cute!. overall, it was a good weekend and things are beginning to take shape in my life once again.

oh and im going riding on wednesday after class which im excited about :)

xxo

my thoughts in a nut shell..

"I get the creeps from all the people in here

I cannot breathe, its too crowded in here

Dont look at me

I dont wanna be seen, touched, heard, bothered by the fellas who got a look in their eye

They wanna take me home without knowin my name

They wanna put me on

But what they dont know is that Im not like the others"

xxo

Baltimore Tattoo Convention

Im not even sure where to start with this one. NOTHING went the way I had planned, but it still managed to work out perfectly and ended up being the best weekend of my life. Me and Keri booked a room at the Sheraton Hotel right in Baltimore, which was cool cause the convention was right in the hotel. So Im about 30 minutes away from Baltimore and Keri calls me saying she cant come anymore cause her car wont start. At this point I had no idea what to do. I arrive at the hotel, by myself, with like 5 bags of stuff. I checked in and went to my room and started to get ready while I figured out what to do in this situation. Luckily, Kait and her two friends Kat and Marissa came down from jersey, and also Mark came down from PA. I went down to the convention around 3ish and went to the GQ booth where I had to help sell raffle tickets and merch and what not. A few hours later, Frankie (Leader/Founder of the GQs) told me that I was going to be the one who presented all the awards to the tattoo contest winners. I was so nervous, and my feet were KILLING me cause of the heels i had to wear, but overall, it went well. Im still waiting on all the photos and videos. Right after I presented the awards, I had to run and do the pin-up contest that I had entered. I thought I had no chance of winning, but I ended up being the runner up. Anton and his friends came and cheered for me which was awesome too. After the contest i ranned and grabbed all my stuff at the booth and me anton and his friends and kait and mark went up to the hotel and hung out for a little. We looked out my window and saw 2 girls flashing the world from the hotel across from us, and then some dude was taking pics of their cooters, it was awkward. Uhmm a little while later we walked to the sidebar for a show. At this point I was completely out of it and had no idea what was going on. I met a bunch of new people though. And from what I can remember, me and anton left the sidebar and walked back to the hotel to get my car. NEXT MORING: Im supposed to check out of the hotel around 12, but I extended my time till about 8, cause I still had a lot of work to do at the convention. It wasnt as eventful as saturday night though. All we did was mostly pack up our stuff. I met back up with mark, and we went to the sidebar for another show. I was exhausted so i just sat at the bar the whole time and played some game called "photofind" with some dude that i dont know. After the show me dan anton and his friend court i think her name was (im the worst with names) left and went back to my car. I left the next morning. And i got a parking citation for $42. haha whatev. I had the best weekend of my life and Im bummed that it ended so quickly...im actually just bummed that it ended, period. 

(PICS COMING SOON)

cant even think of a good title for this entry...

not exactly sure why 2009 started off so good and then immediately reversed itself COMPLETELY. one thing i can tell you, is that 2009 is making me learn a lot more about myself then i ever though i knew..which i guess is a good thing, except for the fact that im learning everything the hard way. we are only halfway through january, so who knows what the rest of the year may bring. for one, im starting to notice that im becoming more and more independant each day. i have a few people to thank for that. for starters id like to thank those of my "friends" who turned on me when i needed them the most. honestly, thank you. your only making me into a better person by showing me that i cant rely on other people to make me happy, or make my problems go away. i can do all of that on my own. aside from all of that though, i feel so out of place lately. mentally, not socially. my mind is wandering into places i hoped it never would. im confused and so angry cause its all new to me and i have no idea what to do from here. i know i will figure this mess out in time, but the one thing i will never do is ask someone for help. i feel like when i ask anyone for help im "giving in" or showing that im weak, which i know im not. 

On a better note, i went to the cold world show last night in Edison where i met up and sandra and martina. if it wasnt for them being there i probably would have gone insane...or maybe even kidnapped (haha they know what im talking about). it was the first time me and sandra actually really hung out and im so glad we did cause we have more in common then i ever thought we would...and as for this coming weekend, january 23-25, its the baltimore tattoo convention. me and keri will be there all weekend with the maryland GQs and a few other girls from different state chapters. not exactly sure what the daytime will bring us, but maybe if im lucky ill be able to get tattooed while im there..but the nighttime will consist of lots of partying. so stoked.

i need some much needed sleep.

night

xxo

if i learned anything in 2008...

when something seems too good to be true... it usually is.

xxo

HAPPY 2009

so far this year has gotten off to an amazing start. i spent all of new years eve and new years day with sam in baltimore and if i could re-do it all over again i wouldnt change a single thing. and not to mention, its the first new year i spent SOBER since i was a freshmen in high school haha...which is a good thing, by the way. uhmm i helped sam out with some of his shopping before tour and then i met up with mark..he drove down to baltimore and we ate at the cheesecake factory and i drove home afterwards. i hate the feelings i get when i leave baltimore. its so like, depressing.

i hadnt really though of any new years resolutions until tonight when i was driving home...i wouldnt even really call them "resolutions"..cause resolutions are like things that you dont really wanna do, but should..like saying "i will go to the gym everyday"...we all know you dont wanna go (and you most likely wont)..its just something you should do...the things that i came up with are more like, plans..or goals..

1. start a music project with jess

2. move to baltimore 

3. make LOTS of money in cosmetology

4. travel to places i have not been to yet

5. expand modeling career

i cant even remember the rest. ill add on to the list later

xxo